Head and Heart

I am so sorry. I have exposed us to hurt yet again. I saw you staring at me from behind her dead eyes. The glow is gone, the sparkle has left, too tired to be sad, too lame to get angry. Dead eyes. Is this the reason why her eyes are in you rather than me?

I convinced myself that I could also see. But this old heart has been duped many times before and I fear her stigmatism has spread. What I see no longer applies, for what I see no one is ready to acknowledge. When will I stop having relationships with the promise? When will i find one who is. I am the reincarnation of Isis looking for Osiris. He was taken from me. I am doomed to wander this flat earth, consuming hearts and discarding them, only he will do. My sight is blurred. I am your heart. You are my head. She is our host. Please beg her forgiveness on my part. ASk her to trust me again. Tell her I will find him.

Pax et bonum…

I ignored your council. I turned my back on your advice. I comitted us to this and now we are here. Where we have been before, where we feel like we staring at a blank wall, blank dead and quiet. You tried to warn me but I, as usual jumped in, attached all our strings and put all the bread in one basket.

I wont try to justify or blame or defend. This time I am wrong and you are right.

No fuss. No fight.

You must now try to figure out our next step, I will help by creating good intent. I will not sulk or hanker after. I dedicate myself to you. The love I feel for others I now transfer to you. Ask her to be patient, I will try to hurt a little less. Pain is self indulgent. Pain is an illusion, love is the only reality.