Cut and Paste

Why is it that one needs a weekend to recover from the weekend.

Sometimes people make you believe they are more than what they really are, other times people lead you to think they are less. I have decided not to tell people anything for a while. To keep things close to my chest.

Found that if you open your chest too often assholes elbow their way in and leave mud marks all over the place. Takes yonks to get out. Takes years to heal.

I see some close friends of mine are in a spot of trouble, add financial instability to the mix and I promise you right now, they feel like ants under a cruel magnifying glass. I wish I could do more. Give more, say more, please more. But I cant. People are already stretched beyond belief, Ubuntu? You end up saying – dont worry things are going to be better. Just believe. How do I say that with a straight face knowing the worst is yet to come, praying that they find the strenght in their emotional reserves to deal with hardship.

We know hardship, we know the taste of rice with milk and sugar for supper, of sunlight soap and the smell of cold tap water and mud, of R15 petrol and deciding between shirt or shoe…of being enerygy efficient. Of rolling over and playing dead, of saying yes when we really mean no of not having even a choice to bandy about.

I have decided not to buy anything for a while – use what I have, get rid of my car, get a scooter, listen to all my old cd’s and re read my old books. I must first occupy fully the space I have before I embark on any further expansions. Won’t you join me?